After We Decided We Were Really Doing This, What Happened Next?

Once we decided we were really doing this, the excitement became very real, very quickly. So did the weight of the secret we had chosen to keep. For the next year and a half, almost every decision would have to be made quietly, carefully and without the people closest to us knowing what we were planning. There were so many times I wanted to talk about it, ask opinions, share an idea or simply tell someone how excited I was, but I could not. Before we could begin dreaming about all the little details, we knew we needed to secure the people and places that tend to book far in advance. That meant our venue and our photographer, and for both, I already knew exactly who I wanted.

We reached out to The Station first, a beautiful venue located just outside the city and only a short distance from the town where I grew up. There was something that felt incredibly full circle about choosing a place so close to where my own story began for a day that would celebrate the life Brett and I had built together. When I first called, I tried to keep things vague. I explained that I was planning a special birthday party, but I quickly realized that a venue that primarily hosts weddings throughout the summer was not going to fully understand why my little birthday party felt so important. This was not just a party to me. It was a chance to pause, look around at the life we had created and choose each other all over again, surrounded by the people who had been part of our story. In order for them to truly understand what we needed, the secret had to be shared. I told them what we were planning and trusted them to keep it quiet for the next year and a half. They promised they would, and suddenly we had a venue. We had a place where this idea, which had lived only between Brett and me, could actually happen.

Next was the photographer. I have been so fortunate to have photos taken many times throughout my life for so many different reasons, and I genuinely love the relationships and friendships I have built with the photographers I have worked with. But for this day, there was one person I knew I wanted, and that was Kate. This was not only about having beautiful photos. I wanted someone who would understand how much the day meant to me, someone who could capture the parts that could not be planned, the expressions, the reactions and the small moments I knew would pass far too quickly. By then, I had already learned that it was almost impossible to book the right people without telling them the real story. When I shared the idea with Kate, she immediately gushed over it, understood exactly why it mattered and committed to keeping it completely under wraps. Her excitement made me even more excited, but it also made everything feel much more real.

After that, I barely spoke to either of them for almost a year. It may sound strange to book two of the most important parts of the day and then hardly discuss them, but for me, it was easiest to set it and forget it. The more I talked about the plans, the more I thought about them, and the more likely I knew I would be to accidentally let something slip to a friend or family member. Keeping the secret was harder than I expected because I wanted to share the excitement with the people I loved. Instead, I tucked it away and carried it quietly, knowing there was something so special waiting for all of us.

With The Station booked and Kate committed to capturing the day, the idea was no longer simply something Brett and I talked about in private. We had a date (or so we thought, more to come)! We had a place. We had someone who would preserve the memories for us. For the first time, I could picture it. I could imagine walking into the space, seeing the people we loved and knowing they had no idea what was about to happen. The foundation had been set, the secret was still safe and our plan was officially in motion.